William Shakespeare's As You Like It in the complete original text.
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As You Like It

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Act V. Scene I.

Act V. Scene I.—The Forest of Arden.

Enter TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY.

Touch. We shall find a time, Audrey: patience,
gentle Audrey.
Aud. Faith, the priest was good enough, for
all the old gentleman's saying.
Touch. A most wicked Sir Oliver, Audrey; a
most vile Martext. But, Audrey, there is a youth
here in the forest lays claim to you.
Aud. Ay, I know who 'tis: he hath no interest
in me in the world. Here comes the man you
mean.

Enter WILLIAM.
Touch. It is meat and drink to me to see a
clown. By my troth, we that have good wits have
much to answer for: we shall be flouting; we
cannot hold.
Will. Good even, Audrey.
Aud. God ye good even, William.
Will. And good even to you, sir.
Touch. Good even, gentle friend. Cover thy
head, cover thy head; nay, prithee, be covered.
How old are you, friend?
Will. Five-and-twenty, sir.
Touch. A ripe age. Is thy name William?
Will. William, sir.
Touch. A fair name. Wast born i' the forest
here?
Will. Ay, sir, I thank God.
Touch. 'Thank God;' a good answer. Art
rich?
Will. Faith, sir, so so.
Touch. 'So so,' is good, very good, very excel-
lent good: and yet it is not; it is but so so. Art
thou wise?
Will. Ay, sir, I have a pretty wit.
Touch. Why, thou sayest well. I do now re-
member a saying, 'The fool doth think he is
wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a
fool.' The heathen philosopher, when he had a
desire to eat a grape, would open his lips when
he put it into his mouth; meaning thereby that
grapes were made to eat and lips to open. You
do love this maid?
Will. I do, sir.
Touch. Give me your hand. Art thou learned?
Will. No, sir.
Touch. Then learn this of me: to have, is to
have; for it is a figure in rhetoric, that drink,
being poured out of a cup into a glass, by fill-
ing the one doth empty the other; for all your
writers do consent that ipse is he: now, you are
not ipse, for I am he.
Will. Which he, sir?
Touch, He, sir, that must marry this woman.
Therefore, you clown, abandon,—which is in the
vulgar, leave,—the society,—which in the boorish
is, company,—of this female,—which in the com-
mon is, woman; which together is, abandon the
society of this female, or, clown, thou perishest;
or, to thy better understanding, diest; or, to wit,
I kill thee, make thee away, translate thy life
into death, thy liberty into bondage. I will deal
in poison with thee, or in bastinado, or in steel;
I will bandy with thee in faction; I will o'errun
thee with policy; I will kill thee a hundred and
fifty ways: therefore tremble, and depart.
Aud. Do, good William.
Will. God rest you merry, sir. [Exit.

Enter CORIN.
Cor. Our master and mistress seek you:
come, away, away!
Touch. Trip, Audrey! trip, Audrey! I attend,
I attend. [Exeunt.
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